Restless
Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the…
Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door! — The Statue of Liberty at Ellis Island
“You wanna come in,” Anya asked.
Man, it was tempting. “I’m tired, girl. Next time.”
“Oh, come on, Burt. Just a drink!”
“Alright, just for a bit.”
I went in excited, as the small place always smelled delightful. Entering through the beads that hung from her doorway, I saw little Buddhas all over the place. Incense filled the room and nothing was in order. Everything but her little table of drinks where she sat and watched TV. The bedroom door was open with a camera positioned at her bed.
“I thought you weren’t supposed to be doing that,” I asked.
“Oh, Shaggy won’t find out. I’ll be fine. I need a little extra money, that’s all.”
“You and me both,” I said. “Why don’t you ask for a raise?”
Anya rolled her eyes, “He’ll never go for that. Come on, sit down next to me,” she said hitting the couch pillows and roughing them up.
“I don’t know why you put up with me, girl.”
“I like you, Burt.” She fixed our drinks. “You’re not like the other guys.”
That’s what they all say. She handed me a gin and tonic. It smelled like peaches. Peaches and strawberries.
The room was dark as the Christmas lights strung around gleamed off the glasses. The TV was loud and obnoxious, I hated the annoying sounds of nothingness, but still, I was a lucky guy staring at a twenty-something girl who was crazy about me for whatever reasons. Daddy issues, I’m sure. We screwed from time to time and both enjoyed each other. It was a pretty good life.
“I need some ice.” I got up and went to the sink.
Pills in a baggy. Lots of pills. I brought them to her flinging them on the table.
“What’re you doing, kid?”
She was angry. “What the… How rude. You went through my stuff!”
“It was out on the counter plain as the day. I thought you quit?”
She said nothing.
“Have you been going to your group?”
“No,” Anya said looking away.
“Why not?”
“Why does it matter? You use.”
“I dabble, sweetheart. I’m not addicted.”
“Yeah right.”
“I’m not! You wanna ask me the last time I used? Go ahead.”
“When was the last time?”
“Last week. OK? And anyway, we’re not talkin’ about me. We’re talkin’ about you. You wanna stop, right?”
She looked away and rolled up on the couch, infuriated. “Yeah.”
“Then ya gotta go back to your group, OK?” She didn’t answer. “Alright?”
“Alright,” she said annoyed. “Can we just stop fighting? Can’t we just… you know.” She pulled me down on the couch close. Beauty caused my heart to stir, but then a loud knock on the door came.
“Open up!” Three loud knocks. “Open up!” The guy’s voice was loud and angry, merciless.
“Who is that?”
“Shit…” Anya said timidly. “It’s Shaggy. You gotta hide.”
“Open up or I’m gonna tear down this door,” Shaggy screamed loudly banging on it.
Anya led me inside her closet and shut the door, heading for the front. I could see her through a crack in the door. She opened it as Shaggy came through furious.
“Why you locking the door,” he asked accusing her.
“It’s my door, I can do what I want.”
“Who’s fucking name is on the lease?” He grabbed her wrist. She pulled away from him.
“Yours.”
“That’s right! Why don’t you take my calls? I’ve been callin’ you all goddamn day!” He grabbed her hair. I soared out, and faced him taking his hand away and breaking his wrist. I threw him on the ground as he screamed in howling pain.
“What the — who the fuck are you? Boyfriend,” he asked wrathful.
“I’m not your friend if that’s what you mean,” I yelled.
“You know who I am?” He was angry.
“You know who I am? I can be your worst nightmare, bud. Don’t you lay a fuckin’ finger on her again. Capeesh?”
“You’re crazy. I’m comin’ for you.”
I picked him up and forced him against the closet door. He was scared shitless.
“You’re nothin’, you piece of shit. Next time you come here again. You better show respect to her because if you don’t… I’m gonna have to kill ya and bury your body where no one will ever find it.” I hated guys like him. Scum of the earth. Wasn’t worth it though. I wouldn’t actually do it, but I liked the power. I terrified him.
“OK, OK, man, just put me down,” I put him down. “But she’s gotta pay. She owes me.”
“From what?”
“It’s been weeks, man! A whole month! Pay up, bitch,” he yelled.
I looked at Anya, “Is that true?”
She looked at me arms folded. “Yeah, but he takes too much. You always take too much!”
“You’re a little thief that’s what you are!”
“Alright,” I said. “Enough with the names. How much she owe ya?”
“Ten grand.”
“Shit, well,” I whipped out my cash. “Ten grand, it is. I can see why you’re upset, playa. Here ya go, OK? Now you and her are squared up.”
“Yeah, well I gotta know you’re gonna pay up next week.”
“Go die in a hole,” Anya said angrily. He lunged at her but I caught him by the collar.
“She’s says she’ll pay ya, OK? Now be on your way, bud.” I threw him out quickly shutting the door. “I’m not gonna be able to do that anymore.”
“I never asked you to, Burt. I can take care of myself.”
“The hell you can,” I chuckled.
“Shut up! Just leave,” she said forcefully.
“What’s the matter with ya?”
“Everything, Burt. OK, I’m tryin’ to stay a float, but…”
“But what?”
“It doesn’t matter. All of it. Life. What’s the point?” she asked sincerely. The question scared me like any question. I had nothing to say. What did I know?
“Ya gotta find your own way.”
“What kind of a life is that?”
“I don’t know, kid. Just… hang in there.” I smiled and came close to her but she wasn’t in the mood anymore.
“I gotta take a shower. I gotta work tonight.” She blew past me and slammed her bedroom door.
I left and closed the door going to my apartment. Alone and sad, I went to drown myself in pills.
Unfettered Bones Part 1: First Impressions
“Before we work on artificial intelligence why don’t we do something about natural stupidity?” — Steve Polyakredemptionmagazine.com
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